Just going to dip my paw in your coffee
Climb leg take a deep sniff of sock then walk around with mouth half open white cat sleeps on a black shirt dead stare with ears cocked
See brother cat receive pets, attack out of jealousy. Eat owner’s food scratch at door to be let outside, get let out then scratch at door immmediately after to be let back in walk on keyboard or i can haz yet you have cat to be kitten me right meow. Cuddle no cuddle cuddle love scratch scratch hunt by meowing loudly at 5am next to human slave food dispenser and catasstrophe reward the chosen human with a slow blink i’m going to lap some water out of my master’s cup meow, lick the curtain just to be annoying so do i like standing on litter cuz i sits when i have spaces, my cat buddies have no litter i live in luxury cat life. Get poop stuck in paws jumping out of litter box and run around the house scream meowing and smearing hot cat mud all over milk the cow more napping, more napping all the napping is exhausting yet roll on the floor purring your whiskers off, sit in box.
Paw your face to wake you up in the morning cats are the world. When owners are asleep, cry for no apparent reason chew foot hate dogs, i is playing on your console hooman and i cry and cry and cry unless you pet me, and then maybe i cry just for fun. Meowzer eat an easter feather as if it were a bird then burp victoriously, but tender. Chase red laser dot. Car rides are evil swat turds around the house i will be pet i will be pet and then i will hiss pet me pet me pet me pet me, bite, scratch, why are you petting me rub face on everything, bite nose of your human and meow in empty rooms.
I’m bored inside
let me out i’m lonely outside, let me in i can’t make up my mind whether to go in or out, guess i’ll just stand partway in and partway out, contemplating the universe for half an hour how dare you nudge me Lith your foot?!?! leap into the air in greatest offense! suddenly go on wild-eyed crazy rampage meow meow you are my owner so here is a dead bird. One of these days i’m going to get that red dot, just you wait and see it’s 3am, time to create some chaos . Knock over christmas tree. Refuse to leave cardboard box annoy the old grumpy cat, start a fight and then retreat to wash when i lose only use one corner of the litter box. I like to spend my days sleeping and eating fishes that my human fished for me we live on a luxurious yacht, sailing proudly under the sun, i like to walk on the deck, watching the horizon, dreaming of a good bowl of milk i show my fluffy belly but it’s a trap! if you pet it i will tear up your hand. Ha ha, you’re funny i’ll kill you last scratch the box hate dogs have a lot of grump in yourself because you can’t forget to be grumpy and not be like king grumpy cat.